Return-Path: X-Original-To: info@ausheart.com.au Delivered-To: info@ausheart.com.au Received: from localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id CD0573FA05 for ; Sun, 24 Dec 2006 08:45:50 +1100 (EST) Received: from marlin.fishinternet.com.au ([127.0.0.1]) by localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id 25884-07 for ; Sun, 24 Dec 2006 08:45:37 +1100 (EST) Received-SPF: none (marlin.fishinternet.com.au: 203.16.214.140 is neither permitted nor denied by domain of fathersonline.org) client-ip=203.16.214.140; envelope-from=info@fathersonline.org; helo=ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net; Received: from ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net (ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net [203.16.214.140]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id AD8FA3FA04 for ; Sun, 24 Dec 2006 08:45:36 +1100 (EST) Received: from eth5890.nsw.adsl.internode.on.net (HELO polyglot.com.au) ([59.167.240.1]) by ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net with ESMTP; 24 Dec 2006 08:15:34 +1030 X-IronPort-AV: i="4.12,208,1165152600"; d="scan'208,217"; a="65740152:sNHT98100527" Received: from server ([192.168.1.10]) by polyglot.com.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.1830); Sun, 24 Dec 2006 08:45:19 +1100 Thread-Topic: Planning your Life Reply-To: Message-ID: <420a01c726db$a409d6b0$0a01a8c0@polyglot.local> thread-index: Accm26QHX87S8rmzSO6dN0IM+ugplQ== From: To: Subject: Planning your Life Date: Sun, 24 Dec 2006 08:45:19 +1100 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_420B_01C72737.D77A4EB0" X-Mailer: Microsoft CDO for Exchange 2000 Content-Class: urn:content-classes:message Importance: normal Priority: normal X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.3790.2826 X-OriginalArrivalTime: 23 Dec 2006 21:45:19.0531 (UTC) FILETIME=[A40C47B0:01C726DB] X-TM-AS-Product-Ver: SMEX-7.2.0.1122-3.6.1039-14890.000 X-TM-AS-Result: No--16.082000-5.000000-2 X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at fishinternet.com.au X-NAS-BWL: Found match for 'info@fathersonline.org' on the allowed list (2135 addresses, 0 domains) X-NAS-Classification: 0 X-NAS-MessageID: 7364 X-NAS-Validation: {FF825B7A-B161-40BD-90F8-3582DAE91A1E} This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_420B_01C72737.D77A4EB0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Unable to read this email? Please click here Issue 227 - 25th December, 2006 Go to our website Here * Hello Warwick * Grandads * Laughter * Single Dads * Special Feature * Thought of the Week * All You Need is Love * News & Info * Dad's Prayer * Help Us Hello Warwick The Christmas - New Year period is always a great time of year for families. This is an opportunity to take some time out and hang loose with those you love and hopefully strengthen the bonds of love between us all. The Christmas New Year period is also a great time to reflect on the successes and failures of the past 12 months and plan for an even greater level of success with your family in the next 12 months. There is a lot said about planning when it comes to the workplace, but very little is said about planning when it comes to your family relationships. The saying 'plan your work and work your plan' is a good one, but I suggest a new saying that you can adopt as your own - 'plan your life and relationise your plan'. Unfortunately the drive within our culture is to acquire, consume and get! We have to ask the simple question, 'Is this what life is all about or are there other things?' Jesus Christ, the one whose birthday we are celebrating at this time of the year said something very profound, 'A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions'. True, we all have to eat, wear some clothes and have some sort of shelter from the elements, but after these needs are satisfied, how much more do we really need? I have just returned from Melbourne and staying with friends where we talked about growing up poor. My good friend Steve spoke about living on bread and dripping when he was a youngster. Trying to out do him, I told him that I used to have to borrow money to go on school excursions. Steve said that he never went on school excursions due to lack of money. His son, who has just finished high school said tongue-in-cheek, "Gee, it looks like I really missed out then doesn't it?" After a bit more laughter we all realised that none of us had really missed out at all. You see, what our children treasure more than new toys and school excursions is time. Your wife feels the same way, although she might not tell you in so many words. Another saying of the birthday man is, 'Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.' In many ways our time is our greatest treasure. Most of us, if not all of us, exchange our time plus a certain level of skill or experience for treasure. Our greatest resource then is not our money, but our time. You have all heard the story about the university professor lecturing in time management who placed sand into a container and had great difficultly placing five large rocks into the container because the sand had packed down so hard. He emptied the sand out, placed the five rocks into the container first and then poured the sand in around the rocks. Now he had no trouble fitting in the sand. The professor even poured two cups of water into the container too. Miracle of miracles!! There was room for the rocks, the sand and the water. We spend a lot of time concentrating on the little things when we could be investing in the things that really matter. The five big rocks represent the following five goals: 1) Spiritual Goals 2) Relationship Goals 3) Integrity & Character Goals 4) Financial Goals 5) Self & Self-Development Goals Remember all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Next week we will explore the exciting process of goal setting even further. Lovework Figure out what the big rocks are in your life and your family's life and then begin to plan your life and relationise your plan. Yours for more planning Warwick Marsh PS We at the Fatherhood Foundation wish all our readers a very blessed Christmas & a Happy New Year. Warwick & Alison Marsh and Ron Hellyer who bring the fathersonline to you each week, and members of the Fatherhood Foundation Board: Phil Latz, Geoff Moses and Mark Sewell. Special thanks to all those who contribute articles and help with proofing etc. We would also like to extend huge appreciation to those who have helped, encouraged and financially supported the work of the Fatherhood Foundation. We look forward to a year of growth in 2007. ___________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 31 years. He is the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 25 years to 14 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself. back to top Grandads Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live Margaret Fuller back to top Laughter My MUM by Me My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." My mother taught me RELIGION "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." My mother taught me MORE LOGIC "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" My mother taught me about STAMINA "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION "Stop acting like your father!" My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION "Just wait until we get home." My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!" My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." My mother taught me ESP. " Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" My mother taught me HUMOUR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." My mother taught me GENETICS "You're just like your father." My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a tent?" My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." And the favourite: - My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!" back to top Single Dads A Christmas Message to All our Friends By Tony Miller Dads in Distress would like to thank you all for your help and kindness throughout the year and we want you to know that we appreciate you, especially in the fact that you have made a difference to OUR lives and of OUR children's lives........... It has been a year of many changes, many ups and many downs, which we have survived with your help, our supporters, our lifesavers, our grandparents, our children and the many many women who are standing beside their men fighting for a fair go. Times are changing and although we still have a long way to go, we are already seeing movement forward. The year ahead will be a challenge for our organisation but one which we will face head on. After all, the future of our children is at stake; we cannot fail and we won't. Our children deserve to have two parents in their day to day lives regardless of divorce or separation. Fatherlessness is the major domestic issue of our times and we need to bring this out into the mainstream and make it a civil rights issue in this country. Please spare a thought over the Christmas and New Year celebrations for those dads who for whatever reason cannot be with their children at this time. I light a candle on Christmas Eve and put in my window. I like to think of it as a light guiding those dads and their kids together, if not in person, at least in spirit. I like to think that wherever my kids are on Christmas Eve there is a guiding light to show them the way home to my heart, my love and my thoughts for them. I won't have my kids for Christmas this year but I will in my heart and I will also make room for all of you who are similar circumstances at this time. My thoughts and prayers will be with you all. You may wish to put a candle in your window to help guide someone you know or even maybe someone you don't. And if you are lucky enough to have your kids around you over Christmas give them an extra hug from those of us who haven't. We are so often caught up in our destination that we forget to appreciate the journey, especially the goodness of the people we meet along the way...... We are so pleased we were fortunate enough to meet you....... Thank you for being there when we needed you, we wish you a very special Christmas and a peaceful New Year........ Yours Sincerely Tony Miller dids Inc www.dadsindistress.asn.au back to top Special Feature This poem was written by an Australian Peacekeeping soldier stationed overseas. T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, HE LIVED ALL ALONE IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE, MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE. I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY, WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE, AND TO SEE JUST WHO, IN THIS HOME, DID LIVE. I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS, NOT EVEN A TREE. NO STOCKING BY MANTLE, JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES, OF FAR DISTANT LANDS. WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, AWARDS OF ALL KINDS, A SOBER THOUGHT, CAME THROUGH MY MIND. FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT, IT WAS DARK AND DREARY, I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY. THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, SILENT, ALONE, CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR, IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME. THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, NOT HOW I PICTURED, AN AUSTRALIAN SOLDIER. WAS THIS THE HERO, OF WHOM I'D JUST READ? CURLED UP ON A PONCHO, THE FLOOR FOR A BED? I REALIZED THE FAMILIES, THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS, WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT. SOON ROUND THE WORLD, THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE, A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY. THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM, EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR, BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE. I COULDN'T HELP WONDER, HOW MANY LAY ALONE, ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE, IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME. THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, I DROPPED TO MY KNEES, AND STARTED TO CRY. THE SOLDIER AWAKENED, AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE, "SANTA, DON'T CRY, THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE; I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM; I DON'T ASK FOR MORE, MY LIFE IS MY GOD, MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS." THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP, I COULDN'T CONTROL IT, I CONTINUED TO WEEP. I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, SO SILENT AND STILL, AND WE BOTH SHIVERED FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL, I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ON THIS COLD, DARK NIGHT, THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR, SO WILLING TO FIGHT. THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE, WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA, ITS CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE." ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT "MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT." Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is due to our all of the service men and women for our being able to celebrate these festivities. Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us. back to top Thought of the Week Plan your life and relationise your plan Warwick Marsh back to top All You Need is Love THE OFFICE PARTY By C.W. Nevius San Francisco Chronicle - Sunday, December 17, 2006 Attend your spouse's company shindig; infidelity experts warn of 'workplace affair on steroids' You know the drill for your spouse's holiday office party. There will be stale snacks, tipsy co-workers and that guy with the dumb jokes who always corners you. Wouldn't it be better for everyone if you just stayed home and let your partner have some fun? In a word -- no. That's the advice of relationship counsellors. "Tell all the spouses! Go to the party!'' says Diane Sollee, a marriage therapist who founded SmartMarriages.com. "The Christmas party is the workplace affair on steroids,'' warns Peggy Vaughan, author of "The Monogamy Myth'' and a former corporate consultant who founded DearPeggy.com. "It is playing with dynamite is what it is.'' Really? Just the old office gang, getting together for a few adult beverages and a laugh? What could possibly go wrong? Well, there's the obvious stuff. A Canon Copiers survey last year of its technicians in the United Kingdom found that 32 percent of service calls over the holidays were "to repair copier glass that had been sat on'' or "to fix paper jams that revealed evidence of embarrassing images.'' Ah yes, copier high jinks, a staple of holiday parties. But that's not where the unfortunate behaviour ends. An independent survey of 1,000 office workers in the United Kingdom last year, cited by Canon, found that one-third of respondents have "kissed or gone home with a colleague.'' Now we're getting into problems that could last long after the holiday festivities are over. University of California psychology Professor Dacher Keltner suggests you take a look at the numbers. His best estimate from the research he's seen indicates that "35 to 60 percent of couples will experience infidelity.'' A conservative estimate would be the University of Chicago's "American Sexual Behavior'' survey of married men and women, which found that 36 percent (22 percent of them men and 14 percent women) would have extramarital affairs. And like everyone else who studies relationships, Keltner says the Christmas party is a setup for problems. "You've got a collective gathering,'' he says, "there's the eggnog, you're wearing a Santa hat ...'' OK, but aren't we getting a little paranoid here? After all, it is just a once-a-year party? Not really, says Sollee. She likes to cite the late Shirley Glass, a Baltimore psychologist who was one of the nation's foremost experts on infidelity. Glass noted the rise in the number of women in the workplace and the opportunity for interaction. She jokingly suggested that office buildings post a sign out front reading: "Danger, men and women working together here.' That's why Sollee suggests that spouses show up at the office regularly, from the holiday party to the company picnic. "It's just like war,'' she says. "It is harder to shoot people you know. It is like going in and marking your territory.'' And if you suspect your spouse is having an affair, you should definitely go to the Christmas party, says author Ruth Houston. She wrote "Is He Cheating on You? 829 Telltale Signs.'' Seriously? 829 signs? "Well, they are divided into 21 categories,'' Houston says. Oh, good. Because otherwise it was starting to sound a little obsessive. Houston is a holiday party militant. If you suspect your spouse, she says, you can't afford not to attend. "If anything is going on, it will be evident,'' says Houston. "Someone may be overly friendly, excessively curious, or even hostile.'' Houston also shared her special office party "hot tip'' -- go to the restroom as often as possible. "Make a couple of trips,'' Houston says. "You never know what you might hear. Go into a stall and hang out. Somebody might say something they aren't supposed to say, like, 'Did you see her face when his wife walked in?' '' So, have we completely taken the fun out of the holiday party? With 829 telltale signs to worry about, some spouses may be afraid to reach for a chicken wing for fear of setting off an alarm. With that in mind, Cal's Keltner offers a contrarian view by referencing the work of psychologist Adam Phillips, who wrote "On Flirtation,'' a series of essays on why happily married people flirt. Keltner says Phillips' premise is that, "Romantic bonds are just fundamentally ambiguous, so we are constantly flirting. The idea is that we are playfully, rather than seriously, doing something that is universal and that by acknowledging that, it may in fact be beneficial to flirt.'' So how would that apply to the holiday office bash? "By that theory,'' he says, "the Christmas party is actually the glue that holds marriages together.'' So there's your talking point. All you have to do is convince your spouse. And I'd like to wish you the best of luck. back to top News & Info Together we have been able to raise over 5.3 MILLION DOLLARS in Australia and $750,000 in New Zealand and an enormous amount of awareness for men's health issues. ___________________________________________________ Parents know what drug use can do to their childrens lives. Check out the warning http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20964191-5007146,00.html ________________________________________________________________________ ____ Microsoft dilemma !! Open a new Word document and type: = rand (200,99) then hit "enter" Wait for three seconds and look again... Not even Microsoft people can explain that one Bet you can't either ________________________________________________________ The Fatherhood Foundation wishes all our readers a very blessed Christmas and a Happy New Year. Love and best wishes from Warwick & Alison Marsh and Ron Hellyer, who bring the fathersonline to you each week, and members of the Fatherhood Foundation Board: Phil Latz, Geoff Moses and Mark Sewell. Special thanks to all those who contribute articles and help with proofing etc. We would also like to extend huge appreciation to those who have helped, encouraged and financially supported the work of the Fatherhood Foundation. We look forward to a year of growth in 2007. back to top Dad's Prayer Dear God Help me figure out what my big rocks are. Help me put them in the container first. Let me fit everything else around the things that are really important because I want to make sure that first things come first. After all, a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. back to top Help Us Click here for more information about us Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of harm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and their children's mother. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 440 WOLLONGONG NSW 2520 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscribed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receive future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below or send an email to info@fathersonline.org with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject heading. back to top Click Here to Unsubscribe ------=_NextPart_000_420B_01C72737.D77A4EB0 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Fatherhood Foundation
Unable to read this email? Please click here
Issue 227 - 25th December, 2006 Go to our website Here


Hello Warwick

 

The Christmas - New Year period is always a great time of year for families. This is an opportunity to take some time out and hang loose with those you love and hopefully strengthen the bonds of love between us all. The Christmas New Year period is also a great time to reflect on the successes and failures of the past 12 months and plan for an even greater level of success with your family in the next 12 months. There is a lot said about planning when it comes to the workplace, but very little is said about planning when it comes to your family relationships. The saying 'plan your work and work your plan' is a good one, but I suggest a new saying that you can adopt as your own - 'plan your life and relationise your plan'.

 

Unfortunately the drive within our culture is to acquire, consume and get! We have to ask the simple question, 'Is this what life is all about or are there other things?' Jesus Christ, the one whose birthday we are celebrating at this time of the year said something very profound, 'A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions'. True, we all have to eat, wear some clothes and have some sort of shelter from the elements, but after these needs are satisfied, how much more do we really need?

 

I have just returned from Melbourne and staying with friends where we talked about growing up poor.  My good friend Steve spoke about living on bread and dripping when he was a youngster. Trying to out do him, I told him that I used to have to borrow money to go on school excursions. Steve said that he never went on school excursions due to lack of money. His son, who has just finished high school said tongue-in-cheek, "Gee, it looks like I really missed out then doesn't it?" After a bit more laughter we all realised that none of us had really missed out at all.

 

You see, what our children treasure more than new toys and school excursions is time. Your wife feels the same way, although she might not tell you in so many words. Another saying of the birthday man is, 'Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.'  In many ways our time is our greatest treasure. Most of us, if not all of us, exchange our time plus a certain level of skill or experience for treasure. Our greatest resource then is not our money, but our time.

 

You have all heard the story about the university professor lecturing in time management who placed sand into a container and had great difficultly placing five large rocks into the container because the sand had packed down so hard. He emptied the sand out, placed the five rocks into the container first and then poured the sand in around the rocks. Now he had no trouble fitting in the sand. The professor even poured two cups of water into the container too. Miracle of miracles!! There was room for the rocks, the sand and the water.

 

We spend a lot of time concentrating on the little things when we could be investing in the things that really matter. The five big rocks represent the following five goals:

 

1) Spiritual Goals

2) Relationship Goals

3) Integrity & Character Goals

4) Financial Goals

5) Self & Self-Development Goals

 

Remember all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Next week we will explore the exciting process of goal setting even further.

 

Lovework

 

Figure out what the big rocks are in your life and your family's life and then begin to plan your life and relationise your plan.

 

Yours for more planning

Warwick Marsh

PS We at the Fatherhood Foundation wish all our readers a very blessed Christmas & a Happy New Year.
Warwick & Alison Marsh and Ron Hellyer who bring the fathersonline to you each week, and members of the Fatherhood Foundation Board: Phil Latz, Geoff Moses  and Mark Sewell. Special thanks to all those who contribute articles and help with proofing etc.
We would also like to extend huge appreciation to those who have helped, encouraged and financially supported the work of the Fatherhood Foundation.

We look forward to a year of growth in 2007. 

 ___________________________________________________________


Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 31 years. He is the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 25 years to 14 years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself.

back to top

Grandads

 

Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live

 

Margaret Fuller

 

 

back to top

Laughter

 My MUM
  by Me
 

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

My mother taught me RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me MORE LOGIC
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION
"Just wait until we get home."

My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My mother taught me ESP.
" Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

My mother taught me HUMOUR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My mother taught me GENETICS
"You're just like your father."

My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a tent?"

My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And the favourite: -

My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

back to top

Single Dads

 

A Christmas Message to All our Friends

By Tony Miller

 

Dads in Distress would like to thank you all for your help and kindness throughout the year and we want you to know that we appreciate you, especially in the fact that you have made a difference to OUR lives and of OUR children's lives...........

 

It has been a year of many changes, many ups and many downs, which we have survived with your help, our supporters, our lifesavers, our grandparents, our children and the many many women who are standing beside their men fighting for a fair go. Times are changing and although we still have a long way to go, we are already seeing movement forward. The year ahead will be a challenge for our organisation but one which we will face head on. After all, the future of our children is at stake; we cannot fail and we won't. Our children deserve to have two parents in their day to day lives regardless of divorce or separation. Fatherlessness is the major domestic issue of our times and we need to bring this out into the mainstream and make it a civil rights issue in this country.

 

Please spare a thought over the Christmas and New Year celebrations for those dads who for whatever reason cannot be with their children at this time. I light a candle on Christmas Eve and put in my window. I like to think of it as a light guiding those dads and their kids together, if not in person, at least in spirit. I like to think that wherever my kids are on Christmas Eve there is a guiding light to show them the way home to my heart, my love and my thoughts for them. I won't have my kids for Christmas this year but I will in my heart and I will also make room for all of you who are similar circumstances at this time. My thoughts and prayers will be with you all. You may wish to put a candle in your window to help guide someone you know or even maybe someone you don't.  And if you are lucky enough to have your kids around you over Christmas give them an extra hug from those of us who haven't.

 

We are so often caught up in our destination that we forget to appreciate the journey, especially the goodness of the people we meet along the way......

 

We are so pleased we were fortunate enough to meet you.......

 

Thank you for being there when we needed you, we wish you a very special Christmas and a peaceful New Year........

                          

Yours Sincerely Tony Miller 

dids Inc 

www.dadsindistress.asn.au 

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Special Feature

This poem was written by an Australian Peacekeeping soldier stationed overseas.

 

 T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, HE LIVED ALL ALONE  IN

A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE, MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE.

 

 I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY, WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE,  AND

TO SEE JUST WHO, IN THIS HOME, DID LIVE.

 

I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, NO

TINSEL, NO PRESENTS, NOT EVEN A TREE.

 

NO STOCKING BY MANTLE, JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, ON

THE WALL HUNG PICTURES, OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.

 

WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, AWARDS OF ALL KINDS, A SOBER

THOUGHT, CAME THROUGH MY MIND.

 

FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT, IT WAS DARK AND DREARY,

I  FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY.

 

THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, SILENT, ALONE, CURLED UP ON

THE FLOOR, IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.

 

THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, NOT

HOW I PICTURED, AN AUSTRALIAN SOLDIER.

 

WAS THIS THE HERO, OF WHOM I'D JUST READ?  CURLED UP

ON A PONCHO, THE FLOOR FOR A BED?

 

I REALIZED THE FAMILIES, THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, OWED

THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS, WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.

 

SOON ROUND THE WORLD, THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, AND

GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE, A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.

 

THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM, EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR,

BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.

 

I COULDN'T HELP WONDER, HOW MANY LAY ALONE, ON A COLD

CHRISTMAS EVE, IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.

 

THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, I DROPPED

TO MY KNEES, AND STARTED TO CRY.

 

THE SOLDIER AWAKENED, AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE,

"SANTA, DON'T CRY, THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE;

 

I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM; I DON'T ASK FOR MORE, MY LIFE IS

MY GOD, MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS."

 

THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP, I

COULDN'T CONTROL IT, I CONTINUED TO WEEP.

 

I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, SO SILENT AND STILL, AND WE  BOTH

SHIVERED FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL,

 

I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ON  THIS COLD, DARK NIGHT, THIS

GUARDIAN OF HONOR, SO WILLING TO FIGHT.

 

THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, WITH A VOICE SOFT AND

PURE, WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA, ITS CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE."

 

ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT

"MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT."

 

Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is due to our all of the service men and women for our being able to celebrate these festivities.

 

Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe.

 

Make people stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us.

 

 

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Thought of the Week

 

Plan your life and relationise your plan

 

Warwick Marsh

 

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All You Need is Love

THE OFFICE PARTY

By C.W. Nevius

San Francisco Chronicle - Sunday, December 17, 2006

 

Attend your spouse's company shindig;

infidelity experts warn of  'workplace affair on steroids'

 

You know the drill for your spouse's holiday office party. There will be stale snacks, tipsy co-workers and that guy with the dumb jokes who always corners you. Wouldn't it be better for everyone if you just stayed home and let your partner have some fun?

 

In a word -- no. That's the advice of relationship counsellors.

 

"Tell all the spouses! Go to the party!'' says Diane Sollee, a marriage therapist who founded SmartMarriages.com.

 

"The Christmas party is the workplace affair on steroids,'' warns Peggy Vaughan, author of "The Monogamy Myth'' and a former corporate consultant who founded DearPeggy.com. "It is playing with dynamite is what it is.''

 

Really? Just the old office gang, getting together for a few adult beverages and a laugh? What could possibly go wrong?

 

Well, there's the obvious stuff. A Canon Copiers survey last year of its technicians in the United Kingdom found that 32 percent of service calls over the holidays were "to repair copier glass that had been sat on'' or "to fix paper jams that revealed evidence of embarrassing images.''

 

Ah yes, copier high jinks, a staple of holiday parties. But that's not where the unfortunate behaviour ends. An independent survey of 1,000 office workers in the United Kingdom last year, cited by Canon, found that one-third of respondents have "kissed or gone home with a colleague.'' Now we're getting into problems that could last long after the holiday festivities are over.

 

University of California psychology Professor Dacher Keltner suggests you take a look at the numbers. His best estimate from the research he's seen indicates that "35 to 60 percent of couples will experience infidelity.'' A conservative estimate would be the University of Chicago's "American Sexual Behavior'' survey of married men and women, which found that 36 percent (22 percent of them men and 14 percent women) would have extramarital affairs.

 

And like everyone else who studies relationships, Keltner says the Christmas party is a setup for problems.

 

"You've got a collective gathering,'' he says, "there's the eggnog, you're wearing a Santa hat ...''

 

OK, but aren't we getting a little paranoid here? After all, it is just a once-a-year party? Not really, says Sollee. She likes to cite the late Shirley Glass, a Baltimore psychologist who was one of the nation's foremost experts on infidelity.

 

Glass noted the rise in the number of women in the workplace and the opportunity for interaction. She jokingly suggested that office buildings post a sign out front reading: "Danger, men and women working together here.'

 

 

That's why Sollee suggests that spouses show up at the office regularly, from the holiday party to the company picnic.

 

"It's just like war,'' she says. "It is harder to shoot people you know. It is like going in and marking your territory.''

 

And if you suspect your spouse is having an affair, you should definitely go to the Christmas party, says author Ruth Houston. She wrote "Is He Cheating on You? 829 Telltale Signs.''

 

Seriously? 829 signs?

 

"Well, they are divided into 21 categories,'' Houston says.

 

Oh, good. Because otherwise it was starting to sound a little obsessive.

 

Houston is a holiday party militant. If you suspect your spouse, she says, you can't afford not to attend.

 

"If anything is going on, it will be evident,'' says Houston. "Someone may be overly friendly, excessively curious, or even hostile.''

 

Houston also shared her special office party "hot tip'' -- go to the restroom as often as possible.

 

"Make a couple of trips,'' Houston says. "You never know what you might hear. Go into a stall and hang out. Somebody might say something they aren't supposed to say, like, 'Did you see her face when his wife walked in?' ''

 

So, have we completely taken the fun out of the holiday party? With 829 telltale signs to worry about, some spouses may be afraid to reach for a chicken wing for fear of setting off an alarm.

 

With that in mind, Cal's Keltner offers a contrarian view by referencing the work of psychologist Adam Phillips, who wrote "On Flirtation,'' a series of essays on why happily married people flirt.

 

Keltner says Phillips' premise is that, "Romantic bonds are just fundamentally ambiguous, so we are constantly flirting. The idea is that we are playfully, rather than seriously, doing something that is universal and that by acknowledging that, it may in fact be beneficial to flirt.''

 

So how would that apply to the holiday office bash?

 

"By that theory,'' he says, "the Christmas party is actually the glue that holds marriages together.''

 

So there's your talking point. All you have to do is convince your spouse. And I'd like to wish you the best of luck.

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News & Info

 

 

 

Together we have been able to raise over 5.3 MILLION DOLLARS in Australia and $750,000 in New Zealand and an enormous amount of awareness for men's health issues.

___________________________________________________

Parents know what drug use can do to their childrens lives.

Check out the warning

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20964191-5007146,00.html

____________________________________________________________________________

Microsoft dilemma !!

Open a new Word document and type:
= rand (200,99)
then hit "enter"
Wait for three seconds and look again...
Not even Microsoft people can explain that one
Bet you can't either
________________________________________________________

The Fatherhood Foundation wishes all our readers a very blessed Christmas and a Happy New Year.

 

Love and best wishes from Warwick & Alison Marsh and Ron Hellyer, who bring the fathersonline to you each week, and members of the Fatherhood Foundation Board: Phil Latz, Geoff Moses and Mark Sewell.

 

Special thanks to all those who contribute articles and help with proofing etc.

 

We would also like to extend huge appreciation to those who have helped, encouraged and financially supported the work of the Fatherhood Foundation.

 

We look forward to a year of growth in 2007.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Dad's Prayer

 

 

 

Dear God

 

Help me figure out what my big rocks are.

Help me put them in the container first.

Let me fit everything else around the things that are really important

because I want to make sure that first things come first.

After all, a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.

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Help Us

Click here for more information about us

Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity.
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of harm.

The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence  in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and their children's mother.

If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund
(Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility)
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Or mail cheque and address details to:
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WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund  is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.

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