X-Symantec-TimeoutProtection: 0 Return-Path: X-Original-To: info@fathersonline.org Delivered-To: info@fathersonline.org Received: from localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id B3C5ADEBCF for ; Sun, 11 Feb 2007 09:23:09 +1100 (EST) Received: from marlin.fishinternet.com.au ([127.0.0.1]) by localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id 21129-02 for ; Sun, 11 Feb 2007 09:22:57 +1100 (EST) Received: from ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net (ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net [203.16.214.140]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id ED1ABDEBCC for ; Sun, 11 Feb 2007 09:22:55 +1100 (EST) Received: from eth5890.nsw.adsl.internode.on.net (HELO polyglot.com.au) ([59.167.240.1]) by ipmail01.adl2.internode.on.net with ESMTP; 11 Feb 2007 08:52:48 +1030 X-IronPort-AV: i="4.13,310,1167571800"; d="scan'208,217"; a="86553321:sNHT190132642" Received: from server ([192.168.1.10]) by polyglot.com.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.1830); Sun, 11 Feb 2007 09:21:20 +1100 Thread-Topic: Valentines Day Reply-To: Message-ID: <4380901c74d61$ca40a870$0a01a8c0@polyglot.local> thread-index: AcdNYco+Rat37i4ARrKNyF9XxTMESA== From: To: Subject: Valentines Day Date: Sun, 11 Feb 2007 09:21:20 +1100 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_4380A_01C74DBD.FDB12070" X-Mailer: Microsoft CDO for Exchange 2000 Content-Class: urn:content-classes:message Importance: normal Priority: normal X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.3790.2826 X-OriginalArrivalTime: 10 Feb 2007 22:21:20.0375 (UTC) FILETIME=[CA40A870:01C74D61] X-TM-AS-Product-Ver: SMEX-7.2.0.1122-3.6.1039-14988.001 X-TM-AS-Result: No--9.535000-5.000000-31 X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at fishinternet.com.au X-NAS-BWL: Found match for 'info@fathersonline.org' on the allowed list (2188 addresses, 0 domains) X-NAS-Classification: 0 X-NAS-MessageID: 9549 X-NAS-Validation: {FF825B7A-B161-40BD-90F8-3582DAE91A1E} This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_4380A_01C74DBD.FDB12070 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Unable to read this email? Please click here Issue 233 - 5 th February, 2007 Go to our website Here * Hello Alison * Grandads * Laughter * Single Dads * Special Feature * Thought of the Week * All You Need is Love * News & Info * Dad's Prayer * Help Us Hello Alison A man once said to me, "I told my wife I loved her once, why do I have to tell her again?" Maybe that foolhardy statement is one of the reasons many men get irked by Valentine's Day. I was one of them. Men are headliners, while women are fine print people. Men say, "Just give me the facts." Once we have those facts we don't like going over old ground. We have got it all worked out and we don't like repeating ourselves. The opposite is generally true when it comes to the fairer sex. Women love detail. I don't know how many times I have explained something to my wife and she has asked me for more detail, or to tell it to her again. This can be quite annoying for any husband, especially for a man who is ignorant of a woman's needs as I often am. Well guys, Valentines Day is one of those days you have to repeat yourself and give the woman of your dreams some much needed details. Some people call it 'romance', others call it 'communication'. Whatever it is, if you don't use this opportunity to practice the art of love you are simply being ornery. Sure, Valentine's Day is hopelessly over commercialised but let's face the facts, what isn't over commercialised in our market driven materialistic culture? Our job as fathers is to look for the good within the cultural framework of our existence and then use it to the max. Mother's Day, Father's Day, Anzac Day, Good Friday and Christmas Day all have some redeeming elements for our families. Let's make sure we milk them to the max for the positive effects they can be have on our families. Valentines Day is derived from the name of St Valentine who was a devout Christian living during the reign of Emperor Claudius II. Claudius the Cruel was having a difficult time getting soldiers to join his military campaigns. He believed that the reason was that Roman men did not want to leave their loves or families in order to go to war. As a result, Claudius cancelled all marriages and engagements in Rome. Valentine and Marius, who were the equivalent of modern day priests or Christian ministers, refused to obey this unjust and ridiculous edict. Valentine and others with him continued to aid their fellow Christian martyrs and secretly married couples who wanted to pledge their troth in marriage. For this act of kindness Valentine was put in prison and ultimately cruelly executed. Tradition tells us that while in prison he prayed for the prison guard's daughter who was healed of blindness. Many other young people came to the goal to visit Valentine. Some threw flowers and notes up to his window. They wanted Valentine to know they were thankful that he would risk his life to marry them and accept their vows of love. On the day that he died, February 14, 268 AD, Valentine left a note of love and encouragement for the jailor's daughter in her new found faith, signed simply, 'Your Valentine'. The rest is history. Now 1 billion Valentine's cards are exchanged with words of love and encouragement around the world. Lovework Valentine's Day has a lot of positives. Why don't you celebrate this Valentine's Day, Wednesday 14th February and do something special with the love of your life. Make her feel special. Take her out on a romantic date. Go and see a romantic movie. Repeat yourself creatively with a message of your love for her. Tell her she is the woman of your dreams and the most wonderful mother of your children. Give her the details and fine print that she needs to know she is loved. Remember her needs are different to yours. The greatest thing a man can do for his children is love his wife. Yours for Valentine's Day Warwick Marsh PS Good News!! We have recently secured our much needed office space - great location and great facilities at an affordable price. We will be moving in within the next 4 to 6 weeks. Thank you to all those who have offered assistance. To set the office up properly we will need more help. Any gifts or interest free loans would be greatly appreciated. Remember, all gifts to the Fatherhood Foundation are tax deductible. (Please see 'Help Us' section of newsletter) ___________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 31 years. He is the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 26 years to 14 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself. back to top Grandads Life is the flower for which love is the honey. Victor Hugo back to top Laughter DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!! Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a cheque." "Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog Spike. He won't bother you. But,whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!" When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work. The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!" To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!" Men just don't listen ! back to top Single Dads On Tue 23 Jan 2007 Geoff Holland was lucky enough (thanks to Charlie McKillop) to have a one-to-one meeting with the Attorney-General. Philip Ruddock lasting 45 mins, and later in the day was part of a round-table discussion with about 15 people including the Attorney-General. This week we continue with a second part of the paper that Geoff Holland presented to the Attorney General. Geoff Holland Equal Parenting Movement EqualParenting@optusnet.com.au Part 2 Making the Family Relationship Centres Work 1. The Family Court system is a recipe for conflict. 2. A Presumption of Equal Parenting Time is a recipe for conflict resolution. 3. Equity and reciprocation are basic principles for a fair and cooperative relationship. 4. Conflict is what damages children most. There is broad agreement that we need legislation for a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time. This goal is supported by Dads In Distress, Equal Parenting Movement, Fatherhood Foundation, Fathers4Equality, Grandparents Association, Lone Fathers Association, Men's Confraternity, Men's Rights Agency, Parents4Equality, Shared Parenting Council of Australia (SPCA). There is broad agreement in the Dads' / Parents' movement that Family Relationship Centres are the way to go. However, until they are backed up by a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time, they will not fulfill their potential - in fact we believe they will be a virtual waste of time and taxpayers? money. It is appropriate, yet telling, that solicitors will not be allowed to advise separated parents until they have been to a Family Relationship Centre. Unfortunately parents (esp. Mums) do not need to speak to a solicitor prior to going to a Family Relationship Centre - they already know that they can receive special treatment in the Family Court system. We question the government's sincerity in establishing effective Family Relationship Centres to allow Dads / Non-custodial parents to participate effectively in their children's lives when two of the main organizations involved in tendering for the Family Relationship Centres, Relationships Australia and Centacare, both made submissions to the Parliamentary Inquiry into Child Custody in 2003 arguing against a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time. The government must move to introduce a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time in order to make the Family Relationship Centres work. Otherwise parents (esp. Mums) will know they can just sit out their three hours and move on to the Family Court system where the culture of prejudice against Dads and the reluctance to grant Equal Parenting Time continues to prevail. It is important to have a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time in order to remove the uncertainty - which we regard as largely inconsistent and arbitrary 'discretionary' decision-making by the judge. For example, without a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time, a separated couple will still need to go all the way to the Final Hearing to see if the judge will grant 70% / 30% or perhaps 60% /40%, or perhaps 56% / 44%, or perhaps 62% / 38% or perhaps 51% / 49%. If you are going to give substantial shared residency to both parents, it makes great sense to give 50% / 50% instead of believing there is some virtue in weighting the percentages a little one way or the other. Uncertainty is a major cause of conflict - particularly prolonged uncertainty. Uncertainty compels separated parents to continue all the way to the Final Hearing. A Presumption of Equal Parenting Time would remove uncertainty and the need to continue to a Final Hearing, and greatly improve the success rate of arriving at a negotiated settlement in the Family Relationship Centres. back to top Special Feature A Dad's Guide to Having Fun with the Kids on Valentine's Day From Wayne Parker, Your Guide to Fatherhood. http://fatherhood.about.com I hate to show my bias, but I really like Valentine's Day. I love taking the extra effort to help my wife know how much I love her, and this is a great day for just spoiling her beyond belief. But as I have come to learn over the years, it is also a great opportunity to share the spirit and feelings of Valentine's Day with my children. So, what can a dad do to have a great time with his children with this otherwise romantic holiday? Spoil Your Daughters. A number of years ago, I decided I needed to make a little extra effort for my girls so they would come to appreciate Valentine's Day. I know I set a bit of a high standard for their future boyfriends and husbands, but part of that is intentional on my part. Consider buying them a single rose in a little bud vase, or leaving them some conversation hearts or another Valentine treat where they can find it. Help The Kids Take Care of Mom. As dads know, Valentine's Day is pretty important to the women in our life. Taking some time ahead of the big day to help the kids think about how to recognize their mom will go a long way toward making their day special too. Whether or not you are still with their mom, helping them focus on her will be a real positive for them. Host a Party. Consider helping the kids plan and host a Valentine's Day party on or around February 14. Help them decide whom to invite, prepare invitations, decide on some games and get some treats together. Have a Heart Attack. One of my favorite Valentine's Day activities is called a heart attack. You and the kids pick someone who needs to know they are loved?maybe a friend, a relative, or one of the kids' friends-- and then you plan out the attack. Help the kids cut out lots of red construction paper hearts and glue them onto wooden skewers. Then, in the dark of night, stick them in the front yard of the person who is the subject of the attack. (If they don't have a front yard, use masking tape to tape them to the front door.) The kids will appreciate the opportunity to do a secret project for someone else and the attackee will have a much better Valentine's Day knowing they were remembered. Tell Them Why You Love Them. Kids will appreciate a little note from you that reminds them why you love them. Write about their best qualities and the things you appreciate about their personalities and their characters. Remember Them at School. While each child may feel differently about a school thing, they will appreciate the surprise during the day. For elementary school children, a treat or a surprise in their backpack might be a good approach. For high school or middle school kids, something in their locker would be a good idea. Encourage Creativity. Each child is different in their creative sides. Some may be writers; others may be artists; still others may be good with music. Valentine's Day is a good time to magnify their talents. A family talent show demonstrating their skills, and thus giving of themselves to other family members can be a good Valentine's Day gift. Have Fun with Conversation Hearts. You know those little sugary candy hearts with words on them? Pull some out of the bag and make some fun sentences. See how creative you can be with them. Maybe pick the name of some friend and build some funny descriptions of them (good natured of course). Have a Game Night. Instead of a big party with lots of friends, you might want instead to have a quieter night at home playing some board games together. Pick up some the kids' favorite munchies and spend the evening together. Watch Some Old Family Videos. One of our favorite activities is to watch videos from our children's younger days. We have some great home movies of school programs, birthdays, soccer games and other events. The kids remember the fun times and they often laugh a little at each other's antics. The younger kids will especially like seeing the older ones as little tykes. Sharing memories like these will help build some new memories together. Whatever you decide to do, make sure and stay involved with the kids through the process. Valentine's Day can be a time to make great memories that will last a lifetime and be recalled every year of their lives in February. back to top Thought of the Week To love another person is to see the face of God Lyric from 'Les Miserables' back to top All You Need is Love All the Things We've Never Done (Craig Bickhardt/Jeff Pennig) They drank their anniversary glass A silent moment passed Then they kissed She knows there's something on his mind He'll tell her in due time what it is. He says "I've never built Your mansion on a hill Or warmed you in the Spanish sun I simply blink my eye And think as years fly by Of all the things we've never done" She smiles and takes his hand in hers And says "It just occurred To me now The thought that brings you such regret What hasn't happened yet It makes me proud..." "You never walked away When I needed you to stay Or made me feel I'm not the one There've been no broken vows And the reason we're here now Is all the things we've never done" "We've never grown apart You never broke my heart With secrets that you've kept me from We've never been untrue And I'm still here with you Through all the things we've never done" back to top News & Info HEART DISEASE FACTS Cardiovascular disease (CVD) is the term used for heart, stroke and blood vessel diseases. CVD is the leading cause of death in Australia, accounting for 38% of all deaths in 2002; claiming the lives of more than one in three Australians. CVD is Australia's largest health problem. Despite improvements over the last few decades, the health and economic burden of CVD exceeds that of any other disease. Coronary heart disease is the greatest single cause of death among Australians and stroke is the second largest. Reduce the Risk of Heart Disease Enjoy Healthy Eating Enjoying a variety of foods from the different food groups is the key to healthy eating. Try to: # Eat plenty of plant-based foods including vegetables, fruits and legumes and grain based foods (preferably wholegrain), such as bread, pasta, noodles and rice # Eat moderate amounts of lean meats, skinless poultry, fish and reduced fat dairy products # Replace saturated fat with polyunsaturated and monounsaturated oils and fats. From the Heart Foundation www.heartfoundation.com.au * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Australia's Drought A Call to Pray and Fast Forty Days of Prayer & Preparation beginning Australia Day - 26 Jan 07 The current drought, which is affecting most parts of southern and eastern Australia, is currently reaching crisis proportions. Chris Davis, CEO of the Australian Water Association, says the drought has surpassed the Federation drought of 1895-1902. As the worst drought on record, Blair Trewin, one of the authors of the enclosed 12 month drought report from the Bureau of Meteorology, is more cautious than Chris Davis and his assessment is that some parts of South Eastern Australia and Southern and South Western Australia are not as bad as the Federation drought but some areas are much worse. The final Annual Climate Statement 2006 from the Bureau of Meteorology is also attached or follow the link: http://www.bom.gov.au/announcements/media_releases/climate/change/200701 03.shtml Whatever the case, the drought situation in Australia is crippling the farming community: suicide and farm closures are increasing and now even the big cities are moving into crisis mode. In December 2006 only 2.1% of the state of NSW was not drought affected. Victoria and South Australia were not much better, but in some cases arguably worse. Total NSW dam storage is hovering around 20.4% with many smaller towns carting water from ever dwindling supplies. The capital cities generally speaking are not much better with Sydney on 36% capacity, Melbourne on 38%, Brisbane on 23%, Perth on 27%, Canberra on 38.24% and Adelaide in crisis mode and most likely to run out of water entirely in 2008 if inflows into the Murray-Darling don't increase dramatically. Total inflow of water into the Murray River in December 2006 was 34 gigalitres, the lowest ever on record. The Darling River is similar and could well be in a worse state. Farmers have been told they will not get water this year for irrigation. For some farmers and city dwellers the big dry started in 1996, others in 1999 and for others in 2001. Whatever the case, it continues to this day with the added calamity of bushfires. In Victoria many fires are still burning out of control. The water crisis situation in the capital cities could well be understated if the NSW government is an example of honesty and transparency. Former government advisor Dr Charles Essery claims the NSW government is adding undrinkable deep storage water to the official dam figures to boost supply figures. No doubt the NSW election at the end of March 2007 is one of the reasons no further water restrictions are being added to already nervous householders, whilst other states have introduced much tougher restrictions. The only capital cities without water restrictions are Hobart and Darwin. The rainfall pattern over the last decade has favoured the Northern and North Western parts of Australia which is good news for these sparsely populated areas but this has done little to solve the crisis caused by the drought in the densely populated Southern and Eastern regions of Australia. Many scientists argue that it is all a result of greenhouse gas emissions and climate change. More recently a CSIRO scientist argued that the lack of rain had little to do with climate change but more to do with the natural variables of our Australian climate. The Fatherhood Foundation believes that our nation's problems are both natural and spiritual as per the introduction to The 12pt Plan. We believe in the power of prayer and join with the Australian Prayer Network and the wider Christian community in calling for 40 days of prayer on behalf of our nation to break the drought. This 40 day period of prayer, fasting and preparation will lead up to the Solemn Assembly 9, 10, 11 March 2007 in Canberra where united prayers will be offered on behalf of our nation to break the drought. For more information on the call to prayer: http://www.ausprayernet.org.au ___________________________________________________ Vulnerable Children Left exposed Who parents these kids ? http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,21206857-1243,00.html ___________________________________________________ back to top Dad's Prayer Dear God Help me express my love for my wife this week in a way that I have never done before. Help me use the heroic act of St Valentine as a springboard for some brave act of love. Help me deliver this message of love To my wife in a fresh new way, because she is worthy of much more than I can give her. back to top Help Us Click here for more information about us Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of harm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and their children's mother. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 440 WOLLONGONG NSW 2520 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscribed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receive future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below or send an email to info@fathersonline.org with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject heading. back to top Click Here to Unsubscribe ------=_NextPart_000_4380A_01C74DBD.FDB12070 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Fatherhood Foundation
Unable to read this email? Please click here
Issue 233 - 5 th February, 2007 Go to our website Here


Hello Alison

A man once said to me, "I told my wife I loved her once, why do I have to tell her again?"

 

Maybe that foolhardy statement is one of the reasons many men get irked by Valentine's Day. I was one of them.

 

Men are headliners, while women are fine print people.  Men say, "Just give me the facts." Once we have those facts we don't like going over old ground. We have got it all worked out and we don't like repeating ourselves.

 

The opposite is generally true when it comes to the fairer sex.  Women love detail. I don't know how many times I have explained something to my wife and she has asked me for more detail, or to tell it to her again. This can be quite annoying for any husband, especially for a man who is ignorant of a woman's needs as I often am.

 

Well guys, Valentines Day is one of those days you have to repeat yourself and give the woman of your dreams some much needed details.

 

Some people call it 'romance', others call it 'communication'. Whatever it is, if you don't use this opportunity to practice the art of love you are simply being ornery. Sure, Valentine's Day is hopelessly over commercialised but let's face the facts, what isn't over commercialised in our market driven materialistic culture? Our job as fathers is to look for the good within the cultural framework of our existence and then use it to the max. Mother's Day, Father's Day, Anzac Day, Good Friday and Christmas Day all have some redeeming elements for our families. Let's make sure we milk them to the max for the positive effects they can be have on our families.

 

Valentines Day is derived from the name of St Valentine who was a devout Christian living during the reign of Emperor Claudius II.  Claudius the Cruel was having a difficult time getting soldiers to join his military campaigns.  He believed that the reason was that Roman men did not want to leave their loves or families in order to go to war.  As a result, Claudius cancelled all marriages and engagements in Rome. 

 

Valentine and Marius, who were the equivalent of modern day priests or Christian ministers, refused to obey this unjust and ridiculous edict.  Valentine and others with him continued to aid their fellow Christian martyrs and secretly married couples who wanted to pledge their troth in marriage.  For this act of kindness Valentine was put in prison and ultimately cruelly executed.  Tradition tells us that while in prison he prayed for the prison guard's daughter who was healed of blindness.  Many other young people came to the goal to visit Valentine.  Some threw flowers and notes up to his window.  They wanted Valentine to know they were thankful that he would risk his life to marry them and accept their vows of love.  On the day that he died, February 14, 268 AD, Valentine left a note of love and encouragement for the jailor's daughter in her new found faith, signed simply, 'Your Valentine'.  The rest is history.  Now 1 billion Valentine's cards are exchanged with words of love and encouragement around the world.

 

Lovework

 

Valentine's Day has a lot of positives.  Why don't you celebrate this Valentine's Day, Wednesday 14th February and do something special with the love of your life. Make her feel special. Take her out on a romantic date. Go and see a romantic movie. Repeat yourself creatively with a message of your love for her. Tell her she is the woman of your dreams and the most wonderful mother of your children.  Give her the details and fine print that she needs to know she is loved.  Remember her needs are different to yours. The greatest thing a man can do for his children is love his wife.

 

Yours for Valentine's Day

Warwick Marsh

 

PS Good News!! We have recently secured our much needed office space - great location and great facilities at an affordable price. We will be moving in within the next 4 to 6 weeks.

 

Thank you to all those who have offered assistance. To set the office up properly we will need more help. Any gifts or interest free loans would be greatly appreciated.

 

Remember, all gifts to the Fatherhood Foundation are tax deductible. (Please see 'Help Us' section of newsletter)

 

 ___________________________________________________________


Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 31 years. He is the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 26 years to 14 years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself.

back to top

Grandads

 

Life is the flower

for which love is the honey.

 

Victor Hugo

 

back to top

Laughter

 

DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman.  Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a cheque."

"Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog Spike. He won't bother you.  But,whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen.  But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.  Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled,
"Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"
 


Men just don't listen !

back to top

Single Dads

 

On Tue 23 Jan 2007 Geoff Holland was lucky enough (thanks to Charlie McKillop) to have a one-to-one meeting with the Attorney-General. Philip Ruddock lasting 45 mins, and later in the day was part of a round-table discussion with about 15 people including the Attorney-General.

 

This week we continue with a second part of the paper that Geoff Holland presented to the Attorney General.

 

Geoff Holland

Equal Parenting Movement

EqualParenting@optusnet.com.au

 

 

Part 2

Making the Family Relationship Centres Work

 

1. The Family Court system is a recipe for conflict.

 

2. A Presumption of Equal Parenting Time is a recipe for conflict resolution.

 

3. Equity and reciprocation are basic principles for a fair and cooperative relationship.

 

4. Conflict is what damages children most.

 

 

There is broad agreement that we need legislation for a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time.  This goal is supported by Dads In Distress, Equal Parenting Movement, Fatherhood Foundation, Fathers4Equality, Grandparents Association, Lone Fathers Association, Men's Confraternity, Men's Rights Agency, Parents4Equality, Shared Parenting Council of Australia (SPCA).

 

There is broad agreement in the Dads' / Parents' movement that Family Relationship Centres are the way to go.

 

However, until they are backed up by a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time, they will not fulfill their potential - in fact we believe they will be a virtual waste of time and taxpayers? money.

 

It is appropriate, yet telling, that solicitors will not be allowed to advise separated parents until they have been to a Family Relationship Centre.

 

Unfortunately parents (esp. Mums) do not need to speak to a solicitor prior to going to a Family Relationship Centre - they already know that they can receive special treatment in the Family Court system.

 

We question the government's sincerity in establishing effective Family Relationship Centres to allow Dads / Non-custodial parents to participate effectively in their children's lives when two of the main organizations involved in tendering for the Family Relationship Centres, Relationships Australia and Centacare, both made submissions to the Parliamentary Inquiry into Child Custody in 2003 arguing against a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time.

 

The government must move to introduce a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time in order to make the Family Relationship Centres work.  Otherwise parents (esp. Mums) will know they can just sit out their three hours and move on to the Family Court system where the culture of prejudice against Dads and the reluctance to grant Equal Parenting Time continues to prevail.

 

It is important to have a Rebuttable Presumption of Equal Parenting Time in order to remove the uncertainty - which we regard as largely inconsistent and arbitrary 'discretionary' decision-making by the judge.

 

For example, without a Presumption of Equal Parenting Time, a separated couple will still need to go all the way to the Final Hearing to see if the judge will grant 70% / 30% or perhaps  60% /40%, or perhaps 56% / 44%, or perhaps 62% / 38% or perhaps 51% / 49%.

 

If you are going to give substantial shared residency to both parents, it makes great sense to give 50% / 50% instead of believing there is some virtue in weighting the percentages a little one way or the other.

 

Uncertainty is a major cause of conflict - particularly prolonged uncertainty.  Uncertainty compels separated parents to continue all the way to the Final Hearing.  A Presumption of Equal Parenting Time would remove uncertainty and the need to continue to a Final Hearing, and greatly improve the success rate of arriving at a negotiated settlement in the Family Relationship Centres.  

 

 

 

 

 

back to top

Special Feature

A Dad's Guide to

Having Fun with the

Kids on Valentine's Day

 

From Wayne Parker,

Your Guide to Fatherhood.

http://fatherhood.about.com

 

I hate to show my bias, but I really like Valentine's Day. I love taking the extra effort to help my wife know how much I love her, and this is a great day for just spoiling her beyond belief. But as I have come to learn over the years, it is also a great opportunity to share the spirit and feelings of Valentine's Day with my children. So, what can a dad do to have a great time with his children with this otherwise romantic holiday?

 

Spoil Your Daughters. A number of years ago, I decided I needed to make a little extra effort for my girls so they would come to appreciate Valentine's Day. I know I set a bit of a high standard for their future boyfriends and husbands, but part of that is intentional on my part. Consider buying them a single rose in a little bud vase, or leaving them some conversation hearts or another Valentine treat where they can find it.

 

Help The Kids Take Care of Mom. As dads know, Valentine's Day is pretty important to the women in our life. Taking some time ahead of the big day to help the kids think about how to recognize their mom will go a long way toward making their day special too. Whether or not you are still with their mom, helping them focus on her will be a real positive for them.

 

Host a Party. Consider helping the kids plan and host a Valentine's Day party on or around February 14. Help them decide whom to invite, prepare invitations, decide on some games and get some treats together.

 

Have a Heart Attack. One of my favorite Valentine's Day activities is called a heart attack. You and the kids pick someone who needs to know they are loved?maybe a friend, a relative, or one of the kids' friends-- and then you plan out the attack. Help the kids cut out lots of red construction paper hearts and glue them onto wooden skewers. Then, in the dark of night, stick them in the front yard of the person who is the subject of the attack. (If they don't have a front yard, use masking tape to tape them to the front door.) The kids will appreciate the opportunity to do a secret project for someone else and the attackee will have a much better Valentine's Day knowing they were remembered.

 

Tell Them Why You Love Them. Kids will appreciate a little note from you that reminds them why you love them. Write about their best qualities and the things you appreciate about their personalities and their characters.

 

Remember Them at School. While each child may feel differently about a school thing, they will appreciate the surprise during the day. For elementary school children, a treat or a surprise in their backpack might be a good approach. For high school or middle school kids, something in their locker would be a good idea.

 

Encourage Creativity. Each child is different in their creative sides. Some may be writers; others may be artists; still others may be good with music. Valentine's Day is a good time to magnify their talents. A family talent show demonstrating their skills, and thus giving of themselves to other family members can be a good Valentine's Day gift.

 

Have Fun with Conversation Hearts. You know those little sugary candy hearts with words on them? Pull some out of the bag and make some fun sentences. See how creative you can be with them. Maybe pick the name of some friend and build some funny descriptions of them (good natured of course).

 

Have a Game Night. Instead of a big party with lots of friends, you might want instead to have a quieter night at home playing some board games together. Pick up some the kids' favorite munchies and spend the evening together.

 

Watch Some Old Family Videos. One of our favorite activities is to watch videos from our children's younger days. We have some great home movies of school programs, birthdays, soccer games and other events. The kids remember the fun times and they often laugh a little at each other's antics. The younger kids will especially like seeing the older ones as little tykes. Sharing memories like these will help build some new memories together.

 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure and stay involved with the kids through the process. Valentine's Day can be a time to make great memories that will last a lifetime and be recalled every year of their lives in February.

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Thought of the Week

 

To love another person is to

see the face of God

 

Lyric from 'Les Miserables'

 

 

 

 

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All You Need is Love

All the Things We've Never Done

(Craig Bickhardt/Jeff Pennig)

 

They drank their anniversary glass

A silent moment passed

Then they kissed

She knows there's something on his mind

He'll tell her in due time what it is.

 

He says "I've never built

Your mansion on a hill

Or warmed you in the Spanish sun I simply blink my eye

And think as years fly by Of all the things we've never done"

 

She smiles and takes his hand in  hers

And says "It just occurred

To me now

The thought that brings you such regret

What hasn't happened yet

It makes me proud..."

 

"You never walked away

When I needed you to stay

Or made me feel I'm not the one

There've been no broken vows

And the reason we're here now

Is all the things we've never done"

 

"We've never grown apart

You never broke my heart

With secrets that you've kept me from

We've never been untrue

And I'm still here with you

Through all the things we've never done"

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News & Info

HEART DISEASE FACTS

Cardiovascular disease (CVD) is the term used for heart, stroke and blood vessel diseases. 

 

CVD is the leading cause of death in Australia, accounting for 38% of all deaths in 2002; claiming the lives of more than one in three Australians.

 

CVD is Australia's largest health problem. Despite improvements over the last few decades, the health and economic burden of CVD exceeds that of any other disease. 

 

Coronary heart disease is the greatest single cause of death among Australians and stroke is the second largest.

  

Reduce the Risk of Heart Disease

Enjoy Healthy Eating

 

Enjoying a variety of foods from the different food groups is the key to healthy eating. Try to:

#     Eat plenty of plant-based foods including vegetables, fruits and legumes and grain based foods (preferably wholegrain), such as bread, pasta, noodles and rice

#     Eat moderate amounts of lean meats, skinless poultry, fish and reduced fat dairy products

#     Replace saturated fat with polyunsaturated and monounsaturated oils and fats.

 

From the Heart Foundation

www.heartfoundation.com.au

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Australia's Drought

A Call to Pray and Fast

Forty Days of Prayer & Preparation

beginning Australia Day - 26 Jan 07

 

The current drought, which is affecting most parts of southern and eastern Australia, is currently reaching crisis proportions. Chris Davis, CEO of the Australian Water Association, says the drought has surpassed the Federation drought of 1895-1902. As the worst drought on record, Blair Trewin, one of the authors of the enclosed 12 month drought report from the Bureau of Meteorology, is more cautious than Chris Davis and his assessment is that some parts of South Eastern Australia and Southern and South Western Australia are not as bad as the Federation drought but some areas are much worse. The final Annual Climate Statement 2006 from the Bureau of Meteorology is also attached or follow the link:

http://www.bom.gov.au/announcements/media_releases/climate/change/20070103.shtml  

 

Whatever the case, the drought situation in Australia is crippling the farming community: suicide and farm closures are increasing and now even the big cities are moving into crisis mode. In December 2006 only 2.1% of the state of NSW was not drought affected. Victoria and South Australia were not much better, but in some cases arguably worse. Total NSW dam storage is hovering around 20.4% with many smaller towns carting water from ever dwindling supplies.

 

The capital cities generally speaking are not much better with Sydney on 36% capacity, Melbourne on 38%, Brisbane on 23%, Perth on 27%, Canberra on 38.24% and Adelaide in crisis mode and most likely to run out of water entirely in 2008 if inflows into the Murray-Darling don't increase dramatically. Total inflow of water into the Murray River in December 2006 was 34 gigalitres, the lowest ever on record. The Darling River is similar and could well be in a worse state. Farmers have been told they will not get water this year for irrigation. For some farmers and city dwellers the big dry started in 1996, others in 1999 and for others in 2001. Whatever the case, it continues to this day with the added calamity of bushfires. In Victoria many fires are still burning out of control.

 

The water crisis situation in the capital cities could well be understated if the NSW government is an example of honesty and transparency. Former government advisor Dr Charles Essery claims the NSW government is adding undrinkable deep storage water to the official dam figures to boost supply figures. No doubt the NSW election at the end of March 2007 is one of the reasons no further water restrictions are being added to already nervous householders, whilst other states have introduced much tougher restrictions. The only capital cities without water restrictions are Hobart and Darwin.

 

The rainfall pattern over the last decade has favoured the Northern and North Western parts of Australia which is good news for these sparsely populated areas but this has done little to solve the crisis caused by the drought in the densely populated Southern and Eastern regions of Australia. Many scientists argue that it is all a result of greenhouse gas emissions and climate change. More recently a CSIRO scientist argued that the lack of rain had little to do with climate change but more to do with the natural variables of our Australian climate.

 

The Fatherhood Foundation believes that our nation's problems are both natural and spiritual as per the introduction to The 12pt Plan. We believe in the power of prayer and join with the Australian Prayer Network and the wider Christian community in calling for 40 days of prayer on behalf of our nation to break the drought. This 40 day period of prayer, fasting and preparation will lead up to the Solemn Assembly 9, 10, 11 March 2007 in Canberra where united prayers will be offered on behalf of our nation to break the drought.

 

For more information on the call to prayer: http://www.ausprayernet.org.au   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

___________________________________________________

 

Vulnerable Children Left exposed

 Who parents these kids ?

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,21206857-1243,00.html

___________________________________________________

 

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Dad's Prayer

 

 

Dear God

 

Help me express my love for my wife this week

in a way that I have never done before.

Help me use the heroic act of St Valentine

as a springboard for some brave act of love.

Help me deliver this message of love

To my wife in a fresh new way,

because she is worthy of much more

than I can give her.

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Help Us

Click here for more information about us

Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity.
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of harm.

The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence  in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and their children's mother.

If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund
(Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility)
Westpac Branch Wollongong
BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558

Or mail cheque and address details to:
PO Box 440
WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund  is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.

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